‘Cause weird. 

Blowing horns, eating ham and jumping maybe 10 times the most were the things I always did when I was young, young and celebrating New Year’s Eve.

I live in a barangay wherein people are the loudest, Pinoy na Pinoy ang celebration, tipong parang merong fiesta tuwing bisperas na ng baong taon. But I and my siblings never had a chance to celebrate the eve like how our barangay does. Once pumatak na yung 12 ng madaling araw, we are locked behind the huge gates of our house, just listening to the firecrackers lit by our kapitbahays, watching fireworks nearby and covering our noses kasi mabaho yung usok. It was plain and simple, how our family celebrate New Year’s Eve, plain but never normal.

Continue reading “‘Cause weird. “

2016 in paragraphs

A close friend of mine told me a couple of days back, hindi raw ako marunong makuntento sa buhay. He told me that I should let go of the happy-ever-after script I have in my head. Over and over he told me na I cannot control what happens every day, he told me that everything should be as natural as possible. Kasi wala daw saysay yong buhay kapag masyado mong kinokontrol. He told me I was a control freak. He told me that I am living inside a fake story. He was mad. Really mad. But yes, as twisted as he may sound, he made sense.

2016- taught me a lot of things. But it never made me contented. I wanted a whole lot, in any kind of way possible. I wanted the best of everything, I wanted to experience everything. I wanted to learn new things, I wanted to meet a bunch of different people from different scenes. I wanted to be a better version of my 2015 self.

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Four months, four days and four-evs. 

I’m back from my hiatus! It has been a long while.

So it’s a minute before 11 now, exactly. I’m in the hospital. Lying down with the most beautiful patient in the whole world- my daughter. It has been a total of four days already. I miss home, I miss my son, I miss work and everything else in between.

This pretty patient told me something earlier, something that broke my heart.

Quoting her, she said “I wish to never get better, I wish to be sick forever, so you’ll always be with me, not sa work mo.”. Hindi ko alam actually how I would react, it was kind of funny/touching/sad in so many ways.

My daughter is just 4 years old, and she is wishing to be sick. Forever. Just for me to be with her. I felt so sorry for her, if I could only slice my body into two, I would. But I can’t.

Continue reading “Four months, four days and four-evs. “

Can’t wait for my alien friends

Ang lakas pala maka-writer kapag kino-quote ka ng mga tao sa twitter.

Totoo nga yong sinabi ng boss namin one time, na kung feeling mo sobrang down ka na about work, kapag feeling mo gusto mo na magquit, search mo lang yong hashtag ng show sa twitter and after reading, mabo-boost ka na.

I did it last night, napagsabihan kasi ako ng EP ko na ang waley waley ng seg ko. She was asking me kung meron daw ba akong pinagdadaanan at kung alam ko raw ba yong ginagawa ko.

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Magic of the umbrella

Need to share. Sobrang ganda ng kanta. Nakakaiyak. Napaka galing talaga ng Alesana ❤

Naalala ko yong huli kong sinulat was about my trek paakyat ng Lake Holon, well hello. Yes, I survived! One for the books again. It was my second time to trek, pero grabe hirap nito compared sa una kong inakyat. May times na yung tuhod ko nadikit na sa mukha ko e. Ang hirap, pero napaka ganda. Bawi naman ang pagod.

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Singular > Plural

Somebody called me Joy again, kanina lang sa airport. “Dad oh! It’s Joy from Inside Out!” sabi nung toddler sa dad niya. Nakakatuwa yung mag-ama. I watched them as I waited for our plane to arrive. They had a lot of moments together. They were so happy. Kung may dala nga lang akong SLR, pinitikan ko na sila.

Sa sobrang tagal ng plane, nainip na rin siguro yung toddler, lumapit siya sakin, asking me if my hair was real, and paano ko daw ginawa. We sort of had a conversation, at sa sobra niyang kulit at daldal, I can’t help but ask, where was his mom. So I asked him. Then he called his daddy, he told me na mommy rin daw niya yung daddy niya. And in ny mind I was like “Aaaahhhhh okaaaaay. Gets.”, kaya pala sila lang ng dad niya ang magkasama.

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Rockstars and childhood heroes

It’s funny when you think about it. How fucked up this world can be. Yung pakiramdam na you’re so used to being treated as nothing, kaya if there comes a time or a person na papahalagahan ka ng sobra, pakiramdam mo may mali. Pinipilit mong may mali.

I’m always against everything. Pakiramdam ko nga, meron akong negativity biscuit na kinakain everyday kaya ganito ang takbo ng utak ko. Kulang na rin ako sa daily dose of Brandon and Randi, seven staright weeks na kasi akong umeere.

I’ve got so many things to share, sa sobrang daming nangyari at nagpakilala sakin these past weeks, I don’t where will I start.

But Im gonna start with the funniest.

Continue reading “Rockstars and childhood heroes”